A guy pulls up in front of a bar driving a car plastered with VOTE BERNIE stickers all over it. When we he walks in the bar he can't help but notice a guy a few bar stools down wearing a red Make America Great ball cap and a red T-shirt that boldly states "We Love you President Trump". In addition, the guy has two beers sitting in front of him.
Now you don't have to be an Einstein to know what this Bernie Sanders supporter thinks. He thinks the guy down the bar is a big conservative. So as loudly as he can he shouts out - "Bartender Give Drinks to Everyone in the bar except that conservative jerk with the hat sitting at the bar".
The bartender quickly pours out everyone a drink as directed and the conservative guy down the bar turns to the man who ordered the drinks and gives him a great big smile and says "Thank You Very Much Sir".
Now this infuriates the guy who ordered the drinks - so once again he loudly orders "Drinks for Everyone Bartender except that conservative jerk sitting down there".
Again the drinks does as directed and gives everyone except the conservative guy as a drink. As before the conservative guy turns to the man who ordered all the drinks and politely says "Thank You Again Sir".
The guy who ordered the two rounds of drinks is now fuming. So for a third time he yells "Bartender Drinks for Everyone again except that conservation asshole down the bar". The conservative guy just continues to sip on his beer until all the drinks are served then once again her turns to guy who ordered them - smiles and says very loudly "Thank You Again my Friend".
The guy ordering the drinks quietly motions for the bartender to come over then asks What the hell is the matter with idiot down there. I have orders three rounds of drinks for everyone in this bar except him and all that silly ass does is smile and thank me. Is he nuts or something?
Oh no replied the bartender - He owns this place.
Welcome to Ralph's Ranch - the second largest commercial rabbit ranch in Wisconsin. Located in the pristine woods of northern WI; we hand-raise "Gabe's Bohemian Style" rabbits which are sold exclusively to fine dining establishments along the East, Gulf and West Coasts. We also offer artic fur lined gloves, olympic grade boot liners, stylish alpine muffs and sensual fur lined foundation garments to heighten connubial winter contact.
History of Ralph's Rabbit Ranch
Showing posts with label Gabe's Gourmet Rabbits. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gabe's Gourmet Rabbits. Show all posts
Monday, November 20, 2017
Tuesday, June 13, 2017
Pop Quiz # 4 from Ralph's Rabbit Ranch Quiz

1. When is Twilight?
a) Only in the morning?
b) Only in the evening?
c) It occurs twice a day both in the morning and at night?
2. Why do Ballet Dancers dance on their toes?
a) because its easier to dance for long periods on your toes then it is on the souls of your feet?
b) because it makes them look taller?
c) because that is the way they were taught to dance ballet?
Friday, June 9, 2017
Pop Quiz # 3 from Ralph's Rabbit Ranch
Nicolai, who was called Nicolai II, began his reign as Czar in 1894. He was an avid rabbit lover and raised rabbits all his life. It is said that once he became Czar he had the palace Chef serve rabbit meals twice a week and all main entrees for official Russian state dinners were to include rabbit meat selected from those rabbits which he personally raised.
1) How long did the Romanov dynasty actually rule over the Russia people - from its start to the end of Czar Nicolai II's abdication in 1917? (approximately?)
a) 100 years?
b) 200 years?
c) 300 years?
2. Which is the most popular Russian in the world? (ask a bartender if you need help)
a) a White Russian?
b) a Black Russian?
c) a Blind Russian?
Tuesday, June 6, 2017
Ralph's Rabbit Ranch Trivia - Humming Birds
Humming Birds are the only birds in the world that can fly in all directions. They can fly forwards, backwards, up, down, left and right. When they do hover at a blossom they always flap their wings in a figure eight pattern.
Sunday, June 4, 2017
Friday, June 2, 2017
Pop Quiz # 2 from Ralph's Rabbit Ranch
1. Malaria is a deadly disease humans get from:
a) Ticks
b) Rabbit
c) Mosquitoes
2. It is easy for females to get drunk on beer then it is on wine?
True or False?
a) True
b) False
Tuesday, May 30, 2017
Pop Quiz # 1 from Ralph's Rabbit Ranch
1. The Ulna is a bone in the human body found in ---
a) the Arm?
b) the Leg?
c) the Chest?
2. True or false?
A pubic hair is a wild rabbit?
a) True
b) False
Saturday, May 6, 2017
Bugs Bunny Was Not A Rabbit
As a Rabbit Rancher – I think – I am an easy going guy; few things seem to upset me. I always try to take life in stride and enjoy every day I am given.
However, I went to a dinner party this week and a loud mouth jerk started to get my blood to boil. As soon as he found out I was a rabbit rancher he started in with a list of rabbit wise-cracks and jokes – none of which were funny. I, along with the rest of the guests, sat there quietly taking it all in and smiling until he began commenting on the Rabbit and the Turtle race and Bugs Bunny - then I blew my stack. I let him have it – I had to shut him down as he had no idea what he was talking about.
Really, I am amazed at how many people get two simple things wrong. First, there never, ever was a story about a Rabbit and a Turtle race. The fable Aesop wrote was about a race between a Tortoise and the Hare. And second, Bugs Bunny was not a rabbit – and Elmer Fudd was always wrong when he kept referring to Bugs as a Waskly Wabbit.
So let’s set the record straight on these two points once and for all – this way you will be able to sound intelligent in the future.
Aesop was a slave born around 620 BC. Some say he was Ethiopian and brought over to Greece as a child. He was a story teller as most slaves could neither read or write. Aesop is credited with creating more than 600 fables all of which have been recorded.
All of his fables presumably had a moral or cryptic message conveyed. Most of his fables involved animals and generally depicts them as the fable's heroes. Most people are familiar with two of his fables - the Tortoise and the Hare as well as the Lion (with the silver in his paw) and the Mouse who helped pull it out.
Now for the record there is a huge difference between a Tortoise and a Turtle.
Now for the record there is a huge difference between a Tortoise and a Turtle.
Yes both are animal’s reptiles and yes both have shells – however Tortoises never, ever go in water whereas Turtles live much of their lives if not all of their lives around water.’
Though Hares and Rabbits have a similar appearance they too are very different. Hares are much larger than Rabbits; they have longer hind legs and very longer ears.
Rabbits always keep the same fur coat color year round whereas the fur coat on a Hare changes with the seasons. Rabbits live underground in burrows whereas Hares always live above ground under bushes and shrubs.
Rabbits are born with their eyes open and can see immediately whereas hares are born with their eyes closed and are unable to see for the first week or so. Rabbits are very social creatures – they like to cluster together, eat together and play together. Hares on the other hand are non-social. They tend to live a solitary life. While Rabbits are very docile and tame, Hares are generally feisty and skittish – leading to the term we all know = ‘Harebrained’; as its difficult to predict what a Hare is about to do next.
Finally, and this is very important; if you can conjure up an imagine of Bugs Bunny in your mind – you will know instantly Bugs is a Hare – not a Rabbit. His long ears and long legs are the give-away
His ears are much longer than most rabbits you will ever see and look how elongated his back legs are – they are so long in fact that Bugs prefers to walk upright rather then hop. It would be anatomically impossible for any rabbit to walk upright.
So the next time someone talks about the Tortoise and the Hare or comments that Bugs Bunny was a nice rabbit ------- be sure to correct them.
So the next time someone talks about the Tortoise and the Hare or comments that Bugs Bunny was a nice rabbit ------- be sure to correct them.
Friday, May 5, 2017
Pop Quiz from Ralph's Rabbit Ranch
1. Malaria is a disease that comes from the bite of a ----
a) a Tick?
b) a Rabbit?
c) a Mosquito
2. It is easier to get drunk on beer then it is on wine?
a) True
b) False
a) a Tick?
b) a Rabbit?
c) a Mosquito
2. It is easier to get drunk on beer then it is on wine?
a) True
b) False
Friday, April 28, 2017
Does your Rabbit Bite?
After looking at the Lady and the rabbit he leans over and politely asks the Lady - Does your rabbit bite? “Never!” replied the lady"
The man reaches down to pet the rabbit and the rabbit bit him hard in the hand taking out a big chunk of skin.
Horrified the man then looks at the lady and says "I thought you said your rabbit doesn't bite”, "He doesn't. This Isn't my rabbit" the Lady replied.
Horrified the man then looks at the lady and says "I thought you said your rabbit doesn't bite”, "He doesn't. This Isn't my rabbit" the Lady replied.
Wednesday, March 29, 2017
Do Rabbit’s Feet Really Bring Good Luck?
Interesting question so let’s start at the beginning to answer it correctly. The ancient Chinese believed the human foot was important because they saw every organ in the human body had a pathway or a “meridian’ to the foot. Consequently people today who practice alternative medicine still believe our feet provide access to all of our body’s internal organs – think acupuncture.
Scientist believe there are approximately 7000 nerve endings in every human’s foot - so many nerve endings in fact that main stream doctors sometimes recommend their patients walk barefoot whenever possible when on grass or in sand to help stimulate the nervous system and generate better health throughout the body.
Now with all that said are rabbit’s feet really lucky? As the owner of a large Rabbit Ranch I see thousands of rabbit feet each year and to tell you the truth I am not sure if they bring good luck or not. Most “expert’s I know of can’t agree if they do. For many it’s just an old superstition. The reality however is the rabbit's foot is the most common good-luck charm around the world. A distant second is the shamrock (4 leaf clover) followed by soft piece of bark from a eucalyptus tree in third place.
Now the origin of the rabbit's foot providing good luck goes back to 6 BC; and though there is no connection between the luck a rabbit’s foot with any scriptural references many European Christians associate the rabbit’s foot with Eastre the goddess of fertility (the goddess today that many associate with Easter). The true believers say you only get the benefits of good luck if you carry a rabbit’s foot in your right front pocket. Others say it must be kept secure in the glove box of your car while you travel and still others say it should be tucked away in a purse or handbag not hanging from a key chain.
Someday try this fun experiment – it’s easy. The next time you watch an awards program on TV like the Oscars - the Emmy’s, the Golden Globe Awards, the Grammys Awards etc. quietly count the number of actors, actresses, directors, producers, songwriters, artists etc. who are holding a rabbit's foot. Watch how they gently rub it as the nominations are called out. It’s amazing how many people who held a rabbit’s foot actually won awards: Earl Flynn, Meryl Streep, Henry Fonda, Loretta Young, William Holden, Betty Davis, Burt Lancaster, Sylvester Stallone, Sharon Stone, Robert De Niro, Gina Davis, Al Pacino, Kate Winslow, Michael Douglas, Ben Affleck, Spencer Tracy, Humphrey Bogart, Kathryn Hepburn, Tom Hanks, George Lucas and Steven Spielberg just a few you might want to consider? Did they deserve their awards? You bet! Did the rabbit’s foot help? I really don’t know.
Now if you are not in to watching award shows here’s another exercise to try. Observe the number of NFL and college coaches who hold rabbit’s feet during a title games or super bowl events; or watch the coaches and managers in the NBA or MLB as well as NASCAR pit crews and PGA caddies.
Personally, I was amazed to learn Michele Obama clutched a rabbit’s foot during both of President Obama’s Presidential debates. Was it a coincidence? Could be! I just don’t know. Also look at old portraits of Christopher Columbus, Admiral Byrd, Captain Cook and even Captain Morgan (that’s right the Caribbean privateer --- he was not a pirate; who after he retired from the high seas began to distill spiced rum.) Look closely at their belts, sashes and boots - see the small rabbit’s foot dangling? Did they have them for luck?
All I can say is people around the world think rabbit’s feet are lucky. You have to decide for yourself.
Scientist believe there are approximately 7000 nerve endings in every human’s foot - so many nerve endings in fact that main stream doctors sometimes recommend their patients walk barefoot whenever possible when on grass or in sand to help stimulate the nervous system and generate better health throughout the body.
Now with all that said are rabbit’s feet really lucky? As the owner of a large Rabbit Ranch I see thousands of rabbit feet each year and to tell you the truth I am not sure if they bring good luck or not. Most “expert’s I know of can’t agree if they do. For many it’s just an old superstition. The reality however is the rabbit's foot is the most common good-luck charm around the world. A distant second is the shamrock (4 leaf clover) followed by soft piece of bark from a eucalyptus tree in third place.
Now the origin of the rabbit's foot providing good luck goes back to 6 BC; and though there is no connection between the luck a rabbit’s foot with any scriptural references many European Christians associate the rabbit’s foot with Eastre the goddess of fertility (the goddess today that many associate with Easter). The true believers say you only get the benefits of good luck if you carry a rabbit’s foot in your right front pocket. Others say it must be kept secure in the glove box of your car while you travel and still others say it should be tucked away in a purse or handbag not hanging from a key chain.
Someday try this fun experiment – it’s easy. The next time you watch an awards program on TV like the Oscars - the Emmy’s, the Golden Globe Awards, the Grammys Awards etc. quietly count the number of actors, actresses, directors, producers, songwriters, artists etc. who are holding a rabbit's foot. Watch how they gently rub it as the nominations are called out. It’s amazing how many people who held a rabbit’s foot actually won awards: Earl Flynn, Meryl Streep, Henry Fonda, Loretta Young, William Holden, Betty Davis, Burt Lancaster, Sylvester Stallone, Sharon Stone, Robert De Niro, Gina Davis, Al Pacino, Kate Winslow, Michael Douglas, Ben Affleck, Spencer Tracy, Humphrey Bogart, Kathryn Hepburn, Tom Hanks, George Lucas and Steven Spielberg just a few you might want to consider? Did they deserve their awards? You bet! Did the rabbit’s foot help? I really don’t know.
Now if you are not in to watching award shows here’s another exercise to try. Observe the number of NFL and college coaches who hold rabbit’s feet during a title games or super bowl events; or watch the coaches and managers in the NBA or MLB as well as NASCAR pit crews and PGA caddies.
Personally, I was amazed to learn Michele Obama clutched a rabbit’s foot during both of President Obama’s Presidential debates. Was it a coincidence? Could be! I just don’t know. Also look at old portraits of Christopher Columbus, Admiral Byrd, Captain Cook and even Captain Morgan (that’s right the Caribbean privateer --- he was not a pirate; who after he retired from the high seas began to distill spiced rum.) Look closely at their belts, sashes and boots - see the small rabbit’s foot dangling? Did they have them for luck?
All I can say is people around the world think rabbit’s feet are lucky. You have to decide for yourself.
Sunday, March 26, 2017
Sunday, March 19, 2017
Very Little Law Enforcement Humor - from a Rabbit Rancher
Did you hear about the midget fortune-teller who escaped from a County Jail? The Sheriff and his Deputies have her officially listed as a small medium at large.
Monday, November 21, 2016
Are Rabbits Left Pawed or Right Pawed?
Many long time friends of Ralph’s Rabbit
Ranch know we get all sorts of questions each week from people around the world.
Last week was no exception. A young girl
from Abilene, Kansas, a High School sophomore named Melissa, wrote seeking help
with a term paper she is writing on Animal Husbandry. Her question was: ‘are rabbits
right pawed or left pawed’. I
thought it was a good question so I will share our reply back to her.
Science tells us that 10 - 12 % of
the human population is left handed and that that percentage has remained
constant the past 300,000 years. We are
told 30,000,000 people in the U.S. are left handed and that woman are more likely
to be righted than left.
Up until the mid 1950’s scientists claimed
that “handedness” was only a human trait that did not apply to lower forms of animals. Today we know this is wrong. Animals of all species display traits of “handedness”
whether they are Cats, Dogs, Cows, Horses or even Goldfishes. “Handedness” is a universal phenomenon in all
living creatures.
To help you think about ‘Handedness’
here’s a question for all NASCAR enthusiasts. Which way to NASCAR vehicles race around a
track? Clockwise or Counter Clock wise?.
For those of you who don’t understand the difference – clockwise races are
designed to favor right-handers drivers while counter clockwise races favor left
hander drivers.
Try this. Think about baseball. Do ball players run the bases clockwise or
counter cock wise? When a player runs from
first to second base and then to third and finally home is he running clockwise
or counter clockwise? If you said
counter clockwise you are correct. Ball players run a left hander lap just as NASCAR
drivers drive counter clockwise.
What about thorough breed horse racing
- either saddled or buggied? Do the
horses run clockwise or counter clockwise. The answer = “left-handed” laps. There’s no real plausible explanation for
this however since the vast majority of professional athletes (human and
horses) normally lead with their dominant hand or foot going left makes them
have to excel harder in order to win.
My understanding of rabbit ‘handedness’
has been acquired over the 14 years I have been raising rabbits commercially. Even
though experts say 10 - 12 percent of the human population exhibits left
handedness our personal observations here at the ranch reveals almost 30% of any
given rabbit population is left pawed. We know this from three things. First, by the way rabbits initiate their
leaps and hops. Left pawed rabbits push
off with their left paws whereas right pawed rabbits kick off with their right paws.
Second, when rabbits position food a
left pawed rabbit will use the left front paw more than a right pawed rabbit will. Finally, when a rabbit gnaws on food like a
carrot - left pawed rabbits gnaw from their left side while right pawed rabbits
begin gnawing from the right side.
Since we keep accurate records on
our breeding cycles we know that older does tend to give birth to more left
pawed kits then younger does. We also know
that left pawed rabbits are more aggressive and appear more intelligent. How do we know this? Left pawed rabbits are generally the first
ones to come out during feeding times and they push and buck to defend their position
in the feeding line.
Studies conducted by the AMA suggest
left handed males have higher levels of testosterone and mature later sexually than
right hander’s - which we agree. Left
pawed bucks are always more prolific during our scheduled breeding sessions; unfortunately
the downside from a Rabbit Ranchers perspective is since left pawed bucks sexually
mature later we get less quality breeding time out of them.
Finally and this is an easy test for
you to perform on your own. The next
time you see a rabbit in your yard or in a field take a moment to study it. Left pawed rabbits tend to look to their left
about 70% more often than their right pawed counterparts. Right pawed rabbits favor looking to their
right side seldom to their left.
Hope this all makes sense and gives
you a better appreciation for rabbits. Your friend Ralph
Thursday, April 21, 2016
Rabbit Fur and Sexual Arousal
As many of you are aware we have tried to occasionally share our answers to the most popular questions we receive - like: “Does a Rabbit’s Foot Really Bring Good Luck” and “Can Rabbit Meat Seasoned with Paprika Really Accelerate Weight Loss and Increase Fertility” and "Were There Really Such Things as "Jack-O-Lopes in the Past".
Without a doubt though the most often question we receive is - “Is Rabbit Meat Really an Aphrodisiac - Can it or does it really improve the desire and quality of active sex lives?”
Well not long ago, a 54 year bank teller from Toledo, Ohio wrote us to ask “Is it possible to Heighten One's Romantic Feelings or Stimulate One's Sexual Desires by using Rabbit Fur during sexual foreplay?” Well the short answer is - “it depends”; and the long answer is “Absolutely”!
Now, anthropologists know from their site excavations that civilizations around the globe have been using rabbit fur as part of their romantic, foreplay for centuries. The Mesopotamians, the Egyptians, the Greeks, the Romans, the Mayans and just about every other advanced ancient civilization always considered rabbit fur precious as it was an integral part of their mating rituals.
In 2011, 99% of the couples who were surveyed in Europe reported having achieved greater sexual results and more intense sexual interactions with their partners when they added rabbit fur to their sexual foreplay. However, like with most situations, there are always exceptions to every rule.
Regrettably, people with overly sensitive skin such as red heads, light blonds and Albinos, as well as individuals who are prone to peanut, milk and shellfish allergies seldom report any significant benefits from including rabbit fur in their intimate encounters. Many believe the tinsel strength of their hair follicle's are different; thus the feel little or no significant impact when they incorporate rabbit fur into sexual foreplay activities.
Now with that one caveat stated - rabbit fur does seem to heighten the sexual arousal and passionate feelings as well as prolong the gratification among most couples during their conjugal interludes.
Here's what I know from first-hand knowledge. Remember this is not based on any scientific study. However years ago when we first opened Ralph’s Ranch we had a small gift shop near the front gate (just off of Hwy F). In this gift shop we sold a variety of rabbit products: primarily rabbit’s feet, rabbit jerky, rabbit fur lined gloves, rabbit fur boot liners, rabbit fur ear muffs, rabbit fur hats, rabbit fur hand muffs, rabbit fur collar extensions (which people loved because they cold easily be adjusted for just about any winter coat).
Anyway Gladys who was our feed blender at that time, was from Austria. She convinced us to offer a fur lined personal foundation garments - for both men and women. The items she suggested were rabbit fur lined brassieres and panties for the women and jock strap type foundation garments for the men.
We went ahead and took Gladys advice and developed an assortment of garments she said where always popular in Austria, Bavaria, Tryollia and the Czechoslovakian areas of Eurpose - all nears the Alps. The garments we designed were lined with ‘Grade IV’ rabbit fur. These foundation garments were sold as items outdoor enthusiasts and winter adventurers might enjoy to help keep them warm. You know people who skied cross county and down hill, as well as snowmobilers, hunters, hikers and ice fisherman, etc.
Our initial thought was these quality fur lined foundation garments would help protect and keep the erogenous zones of men and women warm and cozy while they were out of doors for extended periods of time during cold winter weather.
Almost immediately, feedback began to pour in from those who bought and wore our fur lined foundation garments. Some wore them for work like late shift police officers, linemen for utility companies etc. as well as those you just went out and played on the weekends in the snow. Many I remember were initially embarrassed to share their feedback. However almost everyone giving feedback noticed a significant surge in their amorous feelings after wearing our fur lined garments during the day. Everyone wanted to know if it was the rabbit fur contact that heightened their sexual arousal and was it normal to have such overpowering primal urges after wearing rabbit fur foundation garments.
The feedback was so consistent - and evenly spit between men and women – we actually considered marketing our fur lined foundation garments nationally. Barbra our office manager at the time contacted several big national retailers such as Macy’s, Adam & Eve, Victoria Secrets, Maidenform, Venus' Workshops, Cupids Corner and Wicked Temptations. Though there was considerable interest from all the outlet merchants we got nowhere because of PETA. PETA raised major objections with all the retailers and threatened to initiate boycotts with them thus their interest subsided.
Now I digressed - and I apologize - forgive me. The initial question was - “Can rabbit fur actually induce or heighten carnal delights”? Definitely! Rabbit fur is often thought by many to be a 'magic bullet' something that can re-ignite or re-kindle romantic flames and passions.
Just a small swatch of Grade IV (by the way, for those of you not familiar with this term, Grade IV rabbit fut is the rabbit fur harvested from rabbits in late fall or mid-winter when the rabbit full is at its thickest and densest). The reality many people encounter is that when rabbit fur is gently rubbed over their erogenous zones or their partner's erogenous zones (oh by the way human erogenous zones are those areas on the human anatomy that tend to ignite and perpetuate sexual arousal) it is the areas on our bodies that awakens our sensual arousal - almost to a point of where one becomes uncontrollable in their appetite for more.
For example, have you ever wondered why rabbit fur feels so luxurious to the touch or why it generates such great warmth when we wear it? It is because rabbit fur is one of the densest mammal furs on the planet. Unlike satin and lace which are both synthetic and lightweight and look very nice - rabbit fur has a feel similar to silk and the best part is it actually breathes. Also rabbit fur unlike satin and lace rabbit fur is never affected by body heat or body moisture (such as perspiration) so it always says soft and luxurious to the touch and feel.
Any of you who studied history may recall that during the ancient Sanskrit era, it was the Hindus from India who began to identify and codify the seven principles of the art of the Karma Sutra (the seven ways to enhance sexual desires and ensure meaningful sexual pleasures).
No long after that - the ancient Greeks began to promulgate and encourage communal orgies - who many say were based entirely on the Karma Sutra principles. Ancient scripts written by both the Hindu and the Greeks detail the procedures for gently rubbing rabbit fur over a partner to unleash their conjugal hunger.
What it truly amazingly is that it doesn't take a lot of rabbit fur to arouse oneself or their partner; just a small rectangular swatch of rabbit fur approximately 6” x 9" can produce unbelievable carnal urges most people never dreamt of.
A word of caution. There is no doubt I am prejudice; but I can tell you wild rabbit fur will not work for sexual arousal for obvious reasons. The quality of any rabbit’s fur is directly linked to its daily diet. Wild rabbits forage on whatever edible food they can find in the wild; whereas domesticated or commercially raised rabbis - such as those we raise here at Ralph's rabbit ranch - are fed a consistent diet of good nutritious grains and other wholesome foods which results in all of them having a superior grade fur.
So the answer to the question for the bank tell from Ohio: "Can rabbit fur really ignite sexual arousal and clear a path for greater personal contentment - The answer is an unconditional Yes - for most people!
Feel free to join us Ralph's Rabbit Ranch on face book at www.facebook.com/ralphsrabbitranch to learn about more rabbit legends and folklore. Better yet, link with us on ‘Linked In’ at www.linkedin.com/in/ralphsranch.
If you have a questions about rabbits or rabbit fur send them to
ralphsrabbitranch@gmail.com
As time permits we will get back to you.
Epilogue:
Now for those of you wondering - remember it is always late December, the entire month of January and the first two weeks of February that we here at Ralph's Rabbit Ranch begin to harvest the winter rabbit fur. Our rabbits are Wisconsin raised and that is the time of the year in the northern hemisphere when their fur is at its thickest. It is only during this time period that we feel comfortable to produce Grade IV rabbit fur swatches.
Be advised however that our rabbit fur swatches are always pre-ordered well in advance by couples interested in exploring rabbit fur sexual arousal. Though we actually produce over 14,000 personal swatches we are typically sold out of all our swatches by the first week of March of any given year.
Any of you who studied history may recall that during the ancient Sanskrit era, it was the Hindus from India who began to identify and codify the seven principles of the art of the Karma Sutra (the seven ways to enhance sexual desires and ensure meaningful sexual pleasures).
No long after that - the ancient Greeks began to promulgate and encourage communal orgies - who many say were based entirely on the Karma Sutra principles. Ancient scripts written by both the Hindu and the Greeks detail the procedures for gently rubbing rabbit fur over a partner to unleash their conjugal hunger.
What it truly amazingly is that it doesn't take a lot of rabbit fur to arouse oneself or their partner; just a small rectangular swatch of rabbit fur approximately 6” x 9" can produce unbelievable carnal urges most people never dreamt of.
A word of caution. There is no doubt I am prejudice; but I can tell you wild rabbit fur will not work for sexual arousal for obvious reasons. The quality of any rabbit’s fur is directly linked to its daily diet. Wild rabbits forage on whatever edible food they can find in the wild; whereas domesticated or commercially raised rabbis - such as those we raise here at Ralph's rabbit ranch - are fed a consistent diet of good nutritious grains and other wholesome foods which results in all of them having a superior grade fur.
So the answer to the question for the bank tell from Ohio: "Can rabbit fur really ignite sexual arousal and clear a path for greater personal contentment - The answer is an unconditional Yes - for most people!
Feel free to join us Ralph's Rabbit Ranch on face book at www.facebook.com/ralphsrabbitranch to learn about more rabbit legends and folklore. Better yet, link with us on ‘Linked In’ at www.linkedin.com/in/ralphsranch.
If you have a questions about rabbits or rabbit fur send them to
ralphsrabbitranch@gmail.com
As time permits we will get back to you.
Epilogue:
Now for those of you wondering - remember it is always late December, the entire month of January and the first two weeks of February that we here at Ralph's Rabbit Ranch begin to harvest the winter rabbit fur. Our rabbits are Wisconsin raised and that is the time of the year in the northern hemisphere when their fur is at its thickest. It is only during this time period that we feel comfortable to produce Grade IV rabbit fur swatches.
Be advised however that our rabbit fur swatches are always pre-ordered well in advance by couples interested in exploring rabbit fur sexual arousal. Though we actually produce over 14,000 personal swatches we are typically sold out of all our swatches by the first week of March of any given year.
Sunday, November 29, 2015
Friday, October 30, 2015
The Japanese Banker and Erotic Intercourse
A respected banker from southern Japan is
arguing with his wife about he wants her to perform highly erotic sex.
The man: "Sukitaki.
mojitaka!"
Wife replies: "Kowanini! mowi janakpa!"
The man now angry says: "Toka a anji rodi roumi yakoo!"
Wife literally on her knees begging: "Mimi nakoundinda tinkouji!"
The man shouting: "Na miaou kina Tim kouji!"
I can't believe you just sat there trying to read this – you don’t know Japanese. Boy some people will read anything as long as it is about sex or politics.
Wednesday, May 6, 2015
Interesting Pun Humor - but only for the educated
A County Deputy cited a dog for giving birth to puppies near County Hwy 12 for littering.
Thursday, April 23, 2015
Do Rabbit’s Feet Really Bring Good Luck?
Interesting question so let’s start at the beginning to answer this question correctly.
History tells us the ancient Chinese believed the human foot was very important because they saw every organ in the human body had a pathway or a what they call a “meridian’ to the foot. Consequently individuals who practice alternative medicine today still believe our feet provide access to all of our body’s internal organs – just think acupuncture.
History tells us the ancient Chinese believed the human foot was very important because they saw every organ in the human body had a pathway or a what they call a “meridian’ to the foot. Consequently individuals who practice alternative medicine today still believe our feet provide access to all of our body’s internal organs – just think acupuncture.
Scientists estimate there are approximately 7000 nerve endings in every human’s foot - so many nerve endings, in fact, that main stream doctors often recommend their patients walk barefoot whenever possible when they are on grass or in sand just to help stimulate their nervous system and generate better health throughout the body.
Now with all that said are rabbit’s feet really lucky? As the owner of a large Rabbit Ranch we see thousands of rabbit feet each year and to tell you the truth I am not sure if they bring good luck or not. In fact, most “expert’s" I know and have talked to can’t agree if they do or not.
For many the luck of a rabbit's foot is just an old wives tale or superstition that should be ignored. However, the reality is that the rabbit's foot is the most common good-luck charm found around the world. A far distant second would be the shamrock (a 4 leaf clover) which is then followed by soft piece of bark from a eucalyptus tree coming in third.
The origin of the rabbit's foot providing good luck goes back to around 6 BC; though there is no connection between the luck a rabbit’s foot with any scriptural references many European Christians associate the rabbit’s foot with the goddess Eastre the goddess of fertility. (Coincidentally, Eastre is the goddess many associate with Easter today).
The origin of the rabbit's foot providing good luck goes back to around 6 BC; though there is no connection between the luck a rabbit’s foot with any scriptural references many European Christians associate the rabbit’s foot with the goddess Eastre the goddess of fertility. (Coincidentally, Eastre is the goddess many associate with Easter today).
True believers say you can only get the benefits of good luck from a rabbits foot if you carry it in your right front pocket or hang it from your garment on the right side. Others say you will get good luck if you keep it secure in the glove box of your car while you travel. Still others say it should be tucked away in a purse or handbag and never hang from the purse strap or on a key chain.
Here is a good fun experiment I encourage you to try. The best part is it’s easy. The next time you watch an awards program on TV like the Oscars - the Emmy’s - the Golden Globe Awards - the Grammy Awards etc. quietly count the number of actors, actresses, directors, producers, songwriters, artists etc. who are holding a rabbit's foot in their hand during the evening. Pay attention to watch how they gently rub their rabbi's foot as the list of nominations are called out.
Here is a good fun experiment I encourage you to try. The best part is it’s easy. The next time you watch an awards program on TV like the Oscars - the Emmy’s - the Golden Globe Awards - the Grammy Awards etc. quietly count the number of actors, actresses, directors, producers, songwriters, artists etc. who are holding a rabbit's foot in their hand during the evening. Pay attention to watch how they gently rub their rabbi's foot as the list of nominations are called out.
It’s amazing how many celebrities who held a rabbit’s foot at an awards night actually won an award: Earl Flynn, Meryl Streep, Henry Fonda, Loretta Young, William Holden, Betty Davis, Burt Lancaster, Sylvester Stallone, Sharon Stone, Robert De Niro, Gina Davis, Al Pacino, Kate Winslow, Michael Douglas, Ben Affleck, Spencer Tracy, Sylvester Stalone, Humphrey Bogart, Kathryn Hepburn, Tom Hanks, George Lucas and Steven Spielberg just to name a few you might know? Did they deserve the awards they won? You bet! Did the rabbit’s foot help? I really don’t know.
Now if you are not in to watching award shows here’s another exercise you can easily try. Observe the number of NFL, NBA, MLB and college coaches you see holding rabbit’s feet during title games or super bowl events, Heck you can even see NASCAR pit crews and PGA caddies holding rabbits feet.
Personally, I was amazed to learn that Michele Obama clutched a rabbit’s foot during both of her husband's (President Obama’s) Presidential debates. Was that just a coincidence? Perhaps. It could be! I just don’t know.
Now if you are not in to watching award shows here’s another exercise you can easily try. Observe the number of NFL, NBA, MLB and college coaches you see holding rabbit’s feet during title games or super bowl events, Heck you can even see NASCAR pit crews and PGA caddies holding rabbits feet.
Personally, I was amazed to learn that Michele Obama clutched a rabbit’s foot during both of her husband's (President Obama’s) Presidential debates. Was that just a coincidence? Perhaps. It could be! I just don’t know.
Finally look at the old hand painted portraits of Christopher Columbus, Admiral Byrd, Captain Cook and even Captain Morgan (that’s right the Caribbean pirate who after he retired from high seas began to distill spiced rum in Jamaica). Look closely at all their belts, sashes and straps boots - look for the small rabbit’s foot dangling? Did they carry or wear them for luck? I don't know.
All I conclude is people from all walks of life from around the world think rabbit’s feet are lucky. I encourage you to decide for yourself. For me it was a no brainer. I try to keep a rabbit's foot with me where ever I go and people always comment I am a pretty lucky guy.
All I conclude is people from all walks of life from around the world think rabbit’s feet are lucky. I encourage you to decide for yourself. For me it was a no brainer. I try to keep a rabbit's foot with me where ever I go and people always comment I am a pretty lucky guy.
Monday, March 30, 2015
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)

























